yellow pages news jobs events calendar movie times RSS News Feeds
Rocklin and Roseville Today A/C Service
   |   Current Temp: 91.0 F (32.8 C)

Wife Learns About Dementia Firsthand

"I began noticing something wasn't right in 2006," said 67-year-old Linda Buytendorp of Crawfordville, Florida, "but I was in denial and so was my husband. I told him he needed to see a doctor, but he said nothing was wrong and if I kept it up he was going to walk out and never come back."

What the Buytendorps were denying was husband Frans' out-of-character problems with confusion and memory. Before his retirement, Frans had been the regional president of a chemical company with 14 plants stretching from Boston to Miami. By 2006, he was having trouble understanding his bank statements.

"And he'd been an avid reader, sometimes two or three books a week," said Buytendorp. "Then I began noticing he'd read a book a while and have to start over because of forgetting what he'd read."

When the Buytendorps visited Linda's hospitalized mother in 2010, Frans became deeply confused, including not knowing where he was (Utah), why (to see his mother-in-law) or later that she had died. After returning to Florida, the Buytendorps soon discovered Frans had a form of dementia, probably Alzheimer's disease. Physicians can only diagnose Alzheimer's disease with 100 percent certainty postmortem.

Buytendorp had advice for family members of people exhibiting dementia symptoms. "First, they need to do whatever possible to get their loved ones to a doctor, but not just any doctor," she said. "They need to visit a memory disorders clinic. Our first experience was with a neurologist who didn't specialize in Alzheimer's. He only put my husband on medication, and didn't give us so much as a pamphlet about what would happen during the course of the disease."

So they visited a memory disorders clinic in Tallahassee. "It was there I learned how to care for (Frans) and go along with what he said," she said. "Sometimes, you have to fib to a dementia patient. For example, (74-year-old Frans) sometimes thinks our adult children are still teenagers and will want to know where they are. If I correct him, and say they're grown, he becomes confused. But if I say they are at swim practice and will be home at 9:30, he's all right."

She said learning to not correct her husband's memory has improved their marriage more than anything. Buytendorp also stressed the importance of education, and seeking knowledge from groups like Forget Me Not on Facebook.


LittleGiantFudge.com and Palmer Bus Service make this column possible.

Daniel J. Vance is a licensed professional counselor and national certified counselor from Vernon Center, Minn. His weekly newspaper column Disabilities has been published in more than 260 newspapers.

Daniel J. Vance may be reached at www.danieljvance.com



Placer County News Headlines

Roseville Crime Report Digest Update (7.29.14)Roseville, CA - The Roseville Police Department weekly crime report digest update for July 29, 2014.

Different Standards From Mortgage LendersJulie Jalone of MagnumOne Realty in Roseville, reports on a recent Fannie Mae survey which indicates there may be a growing difference in credit standards between small and large lenders. Which do you think has the tighter credit standards? Check out Julie's article and find out.

PCWA Comments on Bay Delta Conservation PlanDrought Watch: PCWA expresses concern about future water supply reliability for Placer County and claims EIR fails to consider key issues.

Honor Bowl Games at Del Oro August 2014ROCKLIN, CA. - William Jessup University announced today that it will serve as a sponsor for the Northern and Southern California 2014 Honor Bowl football games.

Tahoe Bike Classic Sept. 27 & 28The inaugural Tahoe Bike Classic will take over the Lake Tahoe basin this fall, September 27 & 28, 2014.

Lake Tahoe Marathon Returns September 14thArguably the most beautiful marathon in the world, the Lake Tahoe Marathon returns to Lake Tahoe on Sunday September 14, 2014. Since its inception in 1995, the Lake Tahoe Marathon has evolved into a premier running event

3 Month Old Dies in Sacramento, Parents JailedAshleigh Smith and the 19-year-old father, Terry Scott, were interviewed, they were both booked that night into the Sacramento County Jail on felony child abuse/neglect charges.

Dropping Gas Prices Lift Summer DriversLocal gas prices continue to drop and bring relief to drivers across California and the nation.

Inter-Faith Task Force Seeks New MembersThe Roseville Police Department is hosting an Inter-Faith Task Force comprised of congregational leaders and security teams for churches and other

Lake Tahoe Basin Community Plan Environmental ReviewWith the release of the Notice of Preparation (NOP) for the Environmental Impact Statement/Report, the ongoing update to the complex Tahoe Basin Community Plan continues to make progress

Preventive Autism Treatment Focus of Research AwardsResearch could affect nearly one in every four cases of autism among children in the U.S.

Simple Changes Helping California Small Businesses and EntrepreneursIt's not easy doing business in California. In order to be successful, business owners must overcome many challenges, one of which is dealing with California's complicated tax system


more news